Sunday, we started a new series, “Should Happens.” If you missed it, you can watch it On Demand. I chose this title not just to be “edgy” but to picture how distasteful and even dangerous all the shoulds in our life can be. 

Some “shoulds” are good. We should be the people God wants us to be, and we should do what God wants us to do. Life would be great if we stopped there. But then we are tempted to add a myriad of other “shoulds” that overwhelm us. 

Many “shoulds” are not necessary. You don’t have to clean your bedroom every day. They just add extra burdens and can rob us of joy. And some “shoulds” are actually dangerous. Here’s how that works.

The Devil is called “The Accuser” (Revelation 12:10), who seeks to destroy us (1 Peter 5:8), and he’s an expert. We know from God that we “should” do this or that or be a certain kind of person in the image of Christ. But when we fail, miss the mark, fall short (all terms to describe sin), the Devil jumps on us and highlights our sin, and drives home the idea that we are not good enough. That’s the basis of shame, and shame, I believe, is the great enemy of grace. He exaggerates our failure to do and be all our “shoulds” in our minds. When we take the bate, we obliterate the grace we are to rest in. 

Grace is what assures us of a living relationship with God. The last thing the Devil wants is for us is to be drawn to and even more dependent on God. So he tempts us to focus on what we should do and makes sure we know what a mess we are. The focus moves from God to me. Our focus on all the “shoulds” is just a focus on ourselves. That’s always a losing option. That’s a victory for the evil one.

The Apostle Paul uses the word “law” to describe the principle of the “shoulds” that we labor under. Notice his warning in Galatians 2:21 – I do not set aside the grace of God, for if righteousness could be gained through the law, Christ died for nothing! Paul refuses to push aside grace. He knows that trying to be right and do right cannot be accomplished by living the “should” life. It is only as we draw near to Jesus and invite him to live large in us that we’ll be transformed from the inside out. 

Grace is God’s answer to the law and all the “shoulds.” Grace is the path to joy and freedom. Grace frees us from all the shoulds we won’t or can’t do and leads us back to the One we need, adore, and love – Jesus.

If you haven’t done so yet, you can view the Reflection Guide I prepared to help you move from living under the weight of the “should” life to rest in grace.

Glen Elliott

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